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Bob Walked Into A Sports Bar Around 9:58pm

Bob walked into a sports bar around 9:58pm , sat down next to a blonde at the bar and stared up at the TV.
The 10pm news came on covering the story of a man on the ledge of a large building preparing to jump.
Bob said, “You know, I bet he’ll jump.”
The blonde replied, “Well, I bet he won’t.”
Bob placed a $20 bill on the bar and said, “You’re on!”
Just as the blonde placed her money on the bar, the guy on the ledge did a swan dive off the building, falling to his death.
The blonde was very upset but handed her $20 to Bob, saying, “Fair’s fair. Here’s your money.”
Bob replied, “I can’t take your money. I saw this earlier on the 5pm news so I knew he’d jump.”
The blonde replied, “I did too, but didn’t think he’d do it again.”
Bob took the money.:)

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A Man Walks Into A Bar One Night.

A man walks into a bar one night . He goes up to the bar and asks for a beer.
“Certainly, Sir, that will be 1 cent.”
“one penny?” exclaimed the guy.
The barman replied, “Yes.”
So, the guy glances over at the menu and asks, “Could i have a nice juicy T-bone steak, with fries, peas, and a salad?”
“How much money?” inquires the guy.
“Four cents,” he replies
“Four cents?!” exclaims the guy.” where’s the guy who owns this place?”
The barman replies, “Upstairs with my wife.”
The guy says , “What’s he doing with your wife ? “
The bartender replies, “Same as what I’m doing to his business.”

I Just Bought This State-Of-The-Art Watch

A rather confident man walks into a bar and takes a seat next to a very attractive woman. He gives her a quick glance, then casually looks at his watch for a moment. The woman notices this and asks, “Is your date running late?”
“No”, he replies, “I just bought this state-of-the-art watch and I was just testing it.” The intrigued woman says, “A state-of-the-art watch? What’s so special about it?” “It uses alpha waves to telepathically talk to me,” he explains. “What’s it telling you now?” “Well, it says you’re not wearing any panties…” The woman giggles and replies, “Well it must be broken then because I am wearing panties!” The man explains, “Damn thing must be an hour fast.”

A New Baby for Ex Orphan Emily is Born.

When Emily the elephant was a baby, she was an orphan who was raised by the keepers of the David Sheldrick Wildlife Trust in Kenya. When she got pregnant, something miraculous took place. Instead of having her baby in the wild, Emily decided to return to the Wildlife Trust to give birth in the company of the keepers that took care of her when she was a calf.
This is something you almost never get to see in the wild. Apparently Emily felt really comfortable around humans and she decided it was safer to give birth next to her old friends. After giving birth, the herd gather around her. It is a very powerful sight to see all the other elephants from the family gather around to give Emily support and protection, celebrating with her the arrival of her baby.


A New Baby for Ex Orphan Emily is Born. [via][h/t]

Bear Takes A Seat Next To A Fisherman.

It was nice to see that Drew remained calm. Acting scared and screaming or running away may have agitated the bear into action. Who know? Maybe the bear just wanted to sit down and share a peaceful moment. Whatever the reason, he knew he had to capture this unique moment that you definitely don’t get to see everyday.


Bear Takes A Seat Next To A Fisherman. [via]

Koko The Gorilla With Robin Williams.

When Robin Williams met Koko the gorilla for the very first time, the two became friends and shared a very candid moment together. I love to remember Robin Williams like this. He was so happy and excited to meet a new friend. He was also very curious to know what was going to happen after being introduced to a creature that happened to be from a different species.


Koko The Gorilla With Robin Williams. [via]

Mom Writes Letter To Her Kids About Their Terrible “Summer Behaviour”

Florida Man Tasered After Aggressively Walking Towards Officer.

It’s amazing how 50,000 volts of electricity can turn an absolutely bat shit crazy old man into a calm human being who politely answers a police officer’s questions.

Look, I’ve heard that the hot Florida sun will make people do some pretty insane things. But so will meth.

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We’re not sure whether it was a dose of the sun or the hard stuff that made this guy pull his Toyota Sequoia to the side of the road and then walk into traffic in an effort to stop other cars, but whatever it was, it was no match for a cop with a Taser who was having none of it.


Florida Man Tasered After Aggressively Walking Towards Officer. [via]

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